Why Moms Need A Mom Cave and How To Make One

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Introverts Unite!

With three kids and a work from home husband, there aren’t many places in my house where I can be alone. The problem is that my personality craves alone time. You might think I’m the craziest person in the world, but there have been times when I’ve sat or laid on the couch with a blanket over my head just to give me some sense of solitude…

There is just something about being alone that allows me to relax, breathe deep and recharge.

Whether I need solitude because I’m having a difficult Mom day or simply because I’m exhausted, I decided that napping under a blanket or hiding out in the bathroom just won’t cut it.

My Mom Cave

So I created my own “mom cave.” Check it out:

The beauty of it all is how simple it was to create. I didn’t need to add on to my house, it didn’t cost a penny and only took about an hour to set up. It’s my own little slice of introvert heaven.

How did I do it? Well, it’s also my closet:

I got rid of clothes I wasn’t wearing anyway and simplified things to one side. Then I kept the shelves that were there, moved an old office chair and pulled some unused decorations out to adorn the walls.

Voila! A comfy, cozy little nook for my morning Bible Study time, my Saturday writing time or my mid day “Mama needs a time out” time.

How To Make Your Own Cozy Mom Cave

What if you don’t have your own closet? What if it’s too small?

I’ve had several variations of my mom cave. In our first home, I had a couch and decor in a corner of my garage. It was a kids play area, but I also made it my little morning nook.

I’ve also made a space as simple as a bean bag and a flashlight in a regular small closet.

  • You could use a hall closet, or a linen closet.
  • You could use a home office or a guest bedroom.
  • Maybe an attic or basement would be perfect for you too?
  • Or perhaps a back patio or porch.

Make it Cozy

Whatever the set up, I try to make it a space I look forward to being in. It makes it SO much easier to get up in the morning when I know I have my cozy spot to look forward to.

Here are a few tips:

  • Tea and breakfast. I have a hot water carafe, tea bags and oatmeal packets that I fill each night so I can make tea or oatmeal in the morning.
  • Prepare. I set everything out the night before: My Bible, journal, iPad, tea, bowl etc.
  • Comfy Chair. The seating is comfy but not too comfy. It’s a mom cave, not a napping room.
  • Prepare for visitors. I keep a small blanket, pillow and a few books in there. Not for sleeping but for any early risers who come to visit me.
  • Varied lighting. In the morning, I use the blaring overhead light. It helps me wake up and stay awake. But I also have a little battery powered light for when I’m just trying to relax after a long day. The dim lighting is so much more peaceful.

The Payoff

The best part about my mom cave has been introducing it to my kids. One of my children wakes up at 6:30 every morning to join me and read.

When one of my daughters has a rough day, she’ll go sit in there too. The day I introduced her to the power of just sitting alone, praying and recharging, she left this picture on the marker board I keep in there:

In case you can’t read it, it says:

“Tears! Oh no! >> Resting Place >> Calming Down >> Happy Again.”

So precious.

Do You Need A Mom Cave?

Are you the sort of person that needs alone time? Don’t be afraid of your need for solitude, it might even be something your children need to learn as well.

Do you need a cozy place for your HelloMornings? If you find yourself needing quiet time every now and then, maybe creating a “mom cave” is a project to add to your summer list.

Does anyone else have the need occasional solitude? What space in your home can you repurpose for a “mom cave?” How do you find alone time? Click here to join the discussion!

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Comments

45 Comments

  • Bethany says:

    Love your mom cave. I have a space in my husband’s office that I can escape to blog, sew, or for quiet time. You have inspired me to make it more cozy (not too cozy) and add some items for my kiddos when they come find me. Thanks for sharing!

  • Aubry Smith says:

    This is so clever! The apartment we are about to move into has a walk-in closet in the master bedroom – I may be setting up a mom cave like this. Love it.

  • Jennifer says:

    Love this idea! I have long used my closet as my desk area as well (using half just as you do above), but I never thought to go so far as to make it a retreat… the wheels are churning.
    Began my first HelloMornings Challenge this morning, and grateful for the study and the encouragement!

    • Yay for HelloMornings! Hope you enjoy this summer’s challenge. This challenge has impacted me in many ways since last January when I first enrolled. Praying He will speak to you in those early AM hours!

  • Loving the MomCave! Now, to get Alfred to bring you that tea and oatmeal in the mornings 🙂 I am the same. Need that space to survive and thrive. Hoping one day to have a little nook all of my own. Happy to be a part of HelloMornings summer!

  • Deborah says:

    This is so awesome! I totally need one a mom cave. A bit teary-eyed… desperately want this but how to pull this off in a 2-bedroom apartment with a spouse and 3 kids is befuddling me right now. Any encouraging ideas for this setting?

    • Kat says:

      Deborah,
      Any closet floor should work. If you keep your shoes there, get a hanging shoe holder or a shelf. Get a small pillow, a blanket, a stick on light and a thermos with tea or coffee and you’re all set!

      You might need to get rid of stuff to make room, like I did.

    • Lori says:

      We moved this winter, and for the first time have extra room. The coolest thing about our house is that one of the bedrooms, the one we’re using as our master bedroom right now, has a loft in it. And we don’t use it! We had the computer up there for a while, but needed to move it downstairs so we wouldn’t be so isolated when on it. The plan is to make this room the little kids’ room once they get bigger, and having them use the loft as a playroom, but that’s years away. So for now we’ve got this amazing space that is pretty much storage for my crafts and my husband’s computer stuff.

      All I really need up there is a comfy chair and a small table, and a little bit of organizing, and I’d be all set.

  • Dawn says:

    Oh how I do need my own mom cave! Hmm…now I have to think where I can do this in my house! Thanks!

  • Rachel says:

    Thank you! As a stay at home mom, it can sometimes be hard to give myself permission for that quiet place. Nice to know that I am not the only one that NEEDS it.

  • Lisa says:

    This idea so inspires me! I don’t have a closet big enough to convert, but I certainly have a corner of my bedroom that I need to make my get away space. Thanks for the inspiration!

  • Tiffany says:

    I have a mom cave in the corner of my bedroom. It is small, intimate and filled with my favorite things to give me a little peace. Plus, pens, my Bible and a journal constantly there in order for me to write out whatever I need to. I agree. Every Mom needs a mom cave. Great post Kat!

  • I am SUCH and introvert but have never thought about making a Mom cave. I have kind of taken over the guest room. Made a little “alter” with candles on top of the dresser. Put down my yoga mat and meditation cushion. Its my yoga and meditation space and I can close the door to it. Problem is sometimes its actually occupied by guests…… Oh well nothings perfect 🙁

  • Lisa says:

    I too am in Deborah’s shoes…I SO long for a little spot of refuge, but we don’t have room for a thumbtack in our house right now! For the life of me I can’t come up with a spot to convert/commit to it… It would be do awesome though.. I am an introvert too- and can so identify to that longing for quiet and solitude, which is so hard to come by with three boys and a husband. This is my first time doing the HelloMornings challenge (also doing the Love Like Him study), I excited to begin as my quiet times have been hit and miss for months now due to the recent addition of my third sweet baby boy (now almost 3 mo). Thankfully he’s only waking me once in the night to nurse, allowing me more precious consecutive hours of sleep. Thank you to all of you running this blog & challenge & encouragement!

    • Kat says:

      Lisa,
      What about a temporary spot. You could fill a basket or bag with a pillow, blanket, thermos of tea, Bible etc. Then in the morning or when ever you need it you could convert a spot – it doesn’t need to be permanent. It could even be the bathtub! Stick a couple pillows in there, grab your mug of tea and read. 🙂 A moms gotta do what a moms gotta do.

  • Elizabeth says:

    Some friends and I did some personality tests this weekend and I am a ‘naturalist’ extrovert. I saw your closet pics a while ago and thought about how not seeing outside light would drive me crazy. So I am okay not having a mom cave BUT I do have a table in the living room by a window that I use to do my quiet time in the morning before the kids wake up. Its cool that God made us all different but your mornings (I am still after 1.5 years at 20-30 minutes early) have made a huge difference for me!

    • Kat says:

      Elizabeth,
      GREAT point! We all are made so differently and it’s so important for us and our children that we understand what makes us tick and what makes us thrive.

  • CB says:

    You are definitely speaking to the choir! I commute for 2 hours each way to work a very busy job. When I get home, I literally have to keep going because there is do much to do to prepare for the next day. In the back of mind, I’m always saying to my boys, Please, please be quiet and let me have a minute! So I’ve decided that getting up when everyone is still sleeping is my best bet. it it helps me get thru the day but end up being so exhausted by the end of the day. Praying for a job closer to home

  • JennyM says:

    This is a great idea, I’m even refreshed just by thinking about it! Thank you for sharing it. Love your daughter’s thoughts on it too 🙂

  • melanie says:

    Once again you are awesome to share these great ideas with us! Just moved into a new space and am thinking through a few options… Thanks for the push!

  • Colandra Shead says:

    I’ve never thought about having a Mom Cave but that sounds awesome!!! I am definitely going to have to find a place to make me a Mom Cave. Thanks for sharing!! 🙂

  • I would love a Mom-Cave!!! Just a little bit of me space.
    The kids have their rooms. Hubby has his garage… and the TV remote! And I have the kitchen – totally rewarding, right? Not so much. Although I have come to love it and call it my own. I wasn’t the most domestic person when I got married.

  • Jennifer says:

    In our old house, we had a HUGE walk in closet, close to the size of my son’s bedroom in our current house. I used it as an office once we discovered I was pregnant and I gave up my office for the nursery. I would love to set something up in our new home, but our closet is much smaller and is filled with storage stuff. I guess it is time to start purging junk 🙂

  • Joanna says:

    I love your Mom Cave! I have never thought about making one for myself, but as I was reading I instantly thought of a few places I could use… thank you for the inspiration!

  • Rebecca says:

    I LOVE it! I don’t have a cave…but, I know that I need time alone…in the quiet…I’m grasping on to being ok with being an introvert in a world full of extroverts…..

  • Tanya says:

    LOVE IT! Your article was so down to earth about creating a cozy Mom space; we can do this ladies! I have 2 areas that I have tried to create, but one is also my craft table where nothing gets done right now because of clutter. My other space is a corner in our master bedroom, but it has a huge desk (not so cozy. Makes me feel like I’m in an office, lol!) that my wonderful Hubby has so far refused to get rid of. We also have a large master closet, but that’s Hubby’s corner to get ready for work. Another possibility is a sitting area in our kitchen, but the dogs are there and I like complete quiet, haha! Ideas for all of us: get a small footstool to help alleviate any backaches, when dealing with limited space, a small upholstered ottoman can store our stuff and be a stepstool or chair.

  • Valerie says:

    Ohmgoodness KAT! You’ve made these over the years and you’re just now telling us about them?!? What a great idea! I thought the best we moms got was to run to the bathroom with our chocolate and lock the door for a few minutes.

    Well, this has certainly given me much to think about.

    You’re a genius.

  • […] For her tip, click here. […]

  • Magen says:

    Yes, introverts unite! Love it. I totally need a mom cave. We live in a very small 3 bedroom apartment. Space is limited, but our entire family agrees that one of the rooms goes to mom. I need the mental space and it is great for our family. Also, the girls and Husband are really good about making sure I get one night a week where I leave after dinner for a couple of hours and go to a local coffee shop to write. I am so grateful for that time…and it really makes a huge difference in my patience level 🙂

  • […] love to have my own ‘Mum Cave‘! (Inspired to […]

  • Love this idea! I need a little peace and quiet! I love the coffee shop idea from the comment above too. I’m going to have to work in some “Me Time!” 🙂

  • Mandy Moore says:

    I love this idea, there is just one thing that is missing for me…a window. I have found for me I have to be able to see out. I love to gaze at trees and such, I find them calming and encouraging. I have chosen to make my deck my reading spot for the summer. My husband and kids gave me several plants for Mother’s day which will fill my view very nicely along with the great backyard the Lord has blessed us with. I heard an idea years ago of making a quiet time basket. I think that would work great for my Mom Cave deck. I will grab me a basket and fill it with needed items to take out on my deck and then I can easily move it when done 🙂

  • […] my sanctuary. Most mornings, I meet the Lord in prayer and in his Word in a place we call the Mom Cave.   It is not the place that makes it special but what I do there.  I focus on being filled by […]

  • Hi Kat! I found you from a link on His Pen On My Heart (Tereasa!) and I LOVE this idea!! I now have an empty nest and turned the guest room into the “Hawk’s Nest,” but ohhh when my kids were little? The things I would’ve done for a Mom Cave. That’s GENIUS!

    This is such a great post I have to stalk your site 🙂
    Hugs from VA,
    ~Susan

  • […] this post, I explain how I transformed my closet into a “mom cave” where I have a little desk and […]

  • […] about my project me, that I discovered a post from a writer & site I visit often. The site is Inspired To Action and the writer (they have 10 all together) is Kat. She shared how she created her space (her cave) […]

  • Catherine says:

    Oh my goodness this is the best idea! I’m going to start planning my closet mom cave ASAP. Thanks!!

  • […] The second project was re-doing my closet/office. You may have read my previous posts about how I transformed my closet into a little office space “mom cave” (read about that here). […]

  • […] more privacy? Perhaps you’re staying home, Kat at Inspired to Action talks about her “mom cave” where she does her Bible study. That worked for me for a season when I was waking early. God […]

  • […] about my project me, that I discovered a post from a writer & site I visit often. The site is Inspired To Action and the writer (they have 10 all together) is Kat. She shared how she created her space (her cave) […]